Last week I went to the mall to run an errand.  I pulled up to a parking spot and patiently (I was listening to Pharell’s Happy song – love that song!) waited for this mother to close her driver’s door so I can pull into the spot.  I was in no rush and smiled at her to indicate take your time. She looked agitated and proceeded to close the door and gave me the stink eye while doing it.  Whatever. I was happy because of Happy! I got out of my car and she realized she locked herself out of her car while her two children were inside.

Oh-Oh! “Ooh, how old are they?” I asked. She responded they were 3 and 4. Then the conversation took a turn for the worse. This was the following dialogue (all spelling of expletives were changed because I try not to curse on this blog):

Woman: “I hope that parking space was so phucking important you dumb b!tch!”

Me: (slightly shocked): “No it wasn’t. I may be the dumb b!tch with the phucking important parking space but you are the dumb b!tch who locked herself out of her car.”

I then proceeded to take a picture of her license plate.


Me: “I am taking a picture of your license plate because if anything happens to my car I am going to phuck you up!”

I then continued my path to the mall.

Woman: “HEY! I’m sorry. I am just in a bad mood.”

Me: (Crickets)

The lesson I learned is I need to work on my delivery and not resort to such low-class behavior but at that moment I felt HAPPY.

I am getting there.